Moving Deeper Into the Gift: A Call of Support
Remembering my dreams and releasing limiting thoughts restricting their realization is a process that gifts me the opportunity to heal deep wounds. Why am I afraid to dream big? What stories attach themselves to exciting ideas I have? Where do my beliefs of what is possible come from? Who am I to deserve my dreams, to be happy, when suffering runs rampant on this planet? How do I start with so many walls clouding the vision? Do I truly believe I can do anything I choose?
On the Edge
A dream I have chosen to create, one that exists at the edge of my comfort zone, is to write a book. The more I own this decision and align my language to its manifestation, the more empowered I am on the path and the clearer the vision becomes. This focus is constantly shifting as new variables are introduced, yet the overall sharpness and clarity is enhanced as I release attachment and allow the specifics of the vision to be fluid. I have made the choice to write my first book this winter season and find myself in need of support. One of the easiest ways to receive help is to ask for it.
I am heading south into Baja, Mexico within the next few days to find some free camping on a beach, near an abundance of avocados and mangos, in order to focus on the creative writing process. I had intended to remain in the Baja until I finished writing, however an opportunity has presented itself in Bali at the beginning of February: a five day immersive retreat with one of my mentors, Charles Eisenstein. Charles’ gifts of story have helped to reshape my life in positive, live-affirming ways – inspiring me to give back what I receive in deep gratitude for all life. Bali is a haven for artist creation – a beautiful place to finish writing a book after learning from the “Living Life as an Offering” retreat with Charles.
A More Beautiful World
We all have incredible gifts to offer the world. I believe it is through our unique gifts that we find purpose, meaning, passion, excitement, fulfillment, and the courage to create the more beautiful world our hearts know to be possible. When we are provided the space to discover and give back our gifts in service to love and freedom, we find people jumping at the opportunity. Some part of us longs for the chance to give freely of our gifts and to create our dreams. When we are in alignment with our gifts and desire to put them into service, we open to the flow of life as it happens through us.
Releasing limiting thoughts about what I can and cannot do, happens in step with my experiences at the edge of my comfort zone. What are such thoughts of possibility based on? Do they empower or limit me? Is there an emotion arising that indicates a wound I can observe and heal? I continually face internal criticism and doubt as I let my dreams wander and surf through waves of possibility. Each time a dream is experienced and integrated, the attached doubts are released, the wound healed, and the dreaming expands into newly visible potentials, continuing the spiralling unfolding along the path to remember my inherent wholeness as I Am, right now.
Asking for help with the manifestation of my dream to start writing a book in Mexico, fly to Bali to share in space with a mentor, and remain in Bali to finish creating my first book, has brought up deep divides within myself, calling for reintegration. Guilt around my “not deserving of such enjoyment of life while others suffer”. Fear around the vulnerability of potential failure, “What if I can’t deliver?”. Apprehension around asking for such help, “Is it fair of me to ask this of others?” Self-doubt around the confidence to make it happen, “Should I really speak so confidently of this dream coming into being?”. These thoughts and criticisms pull up deep wounds and create space for me to move beyond into the new and unknown. The inspiration that propels me forward is found in my desire to give back through the gift of story.
Creating a Story
In order to realize my Bali book dream, and to continue offering my gifts freely, I am in need of financial flow beyond what I am presently aware that I will have. This is to cover travel expenses, accommodations, food, retreat costs, and a gift to Charles, who is facilitating the retreat as an open gift. If you feel that you would like to support me in this dream, know that you have my deepest gratitude for your generosity, however you choose to express it. It is this feeling of gratitude that inspires me to continue to give openly, freely, and authentically in whatever way I can, as each moment unfolds. I cast off my doubts each time I receive exactly what I asked for – widening the scope of my asking, sharpening the focus of my receiving, and deepening the breadth of my giving.
Creating and following our dreams requires courage, trust, vulnerability, and flexibility. I offer my gifts to the world in order to create space for others to do the same. We are able to find what we need through the support of those around us. The book I am writing is my gift and contribution to the more beautiful world I know to be possible. I would love to create this story with you.
Monetary flow, gifted in gratitude toward this dream, can be directed through paypal (link on right side) or email transfer (preferred) to [email protected] If you wish to talk more about this, I would love to hear from you as well, any help is welcome!
In love and support,